How to Tell Your Family You’re Eloping Just the Two of You
Eloping feels easy… until it’s time to tell your family. You’re planning something that feels right in your bones. Maybe it’s out in the Arizona desert or tucked away in a quiet spot that means something to you both. But figuring out how to tell your family you’re eloping, that part can get tricky.
Whether your family’s all about traditions or just really into celebrating, this moment doesn’t have to be filled with guilt or weird tension. You can share your plans with heart, honesty, and even a little joy. This guide walks you through how to have that conversation in a way that feels good, because your elopement shouldn’t feel like a secret. It should feel like freedom, presence, and a day that’s unapologetically yours. Let’s talk about how to get there.
How to Tell Your Family You’re Eloping: Drop Hints Early (and Often) About Eloping in Arizona
If the thought of blurting out “we’re eloping!” over brunch makes your stomach flip, start slow. Mention how you’re dreaming of intimate moments, how big weddings feel overwhelming, how you want to make personal memories, or how a desert ceremony at sunrise sounds like actual heaven. These little breadcrumbs ease your people into the idea before you officially say it out loud.
Pro tip: If you know Aunt Linda or your best friend is likely to side-eye the whole elopement thing, let them be part of the soft-launch. Share your thoughts early, ask them what they think, and bring them along emotionally.
Face-to-Face is Best (Even If It’s Virtual)
As your resident Arizona elopement photographers + videographers (and your go-to Sedona elopement photographer team!), we’ve seen it time and again: when couples share their news with a smile and sincerity, most families come around. Telling them in person (or on FaceTime) lets them hear your excitement and see that glow. It’s way easier to share your heart when they can hear the emotion in your voice.
Text? Email? Not unless you’re announcing after the fact. Keep it personal if you’re telling them beforehand.
Tell Them Why It Matters to You
This is huge. Some people hear “elopement” and immediately think “we weren’t invited” or “you’re doing something sneaky.” But when you open up about what this experience means to you, you help them see it for what it really is, a powerful, authentic, intentional, and totally-you way to get married.
Some truths to share:
- We wanted our wedding day to feel like us, free, connected, and deeply personal
- We didn’t want to perform, we wanted to be present
- We’ve been dreaming of adventure more than tradition
- We’re ready to start our life together now, without a year of planning stress
- We’d rather put that wedding budget toward something else we love
You don’t owe anyone an essay. Just speak your heart.
Try something like:
“It’s not that we didn’t want you there, it’s that we really wanted to be fully present with each other in a way we couldn’t imagine doing in front of a big crowd.”
“We’ve always dreamed of doing things our way. This felt true to who we are.”
Give Them a Way to Feel Included
Even if they won’t be there in person, there are so many ways to fold your people into the experience. Maybe you share your vows with them afterward, or FaceTime before the ceremony. Maybe your mom helps pick your bouquet or you wear your grandma’s earrings.
And of course, when the photos and video drop, cue the happy tears.
Share the Visuals After Eloping in Arizona
Speaking of… your Arizona elopement photos are gonna do so much heavy lifting here. When your family sees the sun setting behind Cathedral Rock, the way you’re looking at each other in your private vows, the joy in every frame, they’ll get it. They’ll feel it.
This is why choosing an Arizona elopement photographer who gets you is so key. We don’t just document the day, we tell the story in a way that makes your people feel like they were there.
How to Deal With a Family Member Questioning Your Elopement
You’ve shared your heart, set your vision, and then come the questions. Some people just won’t get it right away, and that’s okay. Here’s how to handle different vibes from different corners of the fam:
Traditional parents: They might be picturing church pews, champagne toasts, and a first dance. Acknowledge their love for tradition, then explain that this is your version of sacred. You’re not rejecting family, you’re choosing presence, peace, and a start that’s entirely your own. Let them know how they still matter to you, even if the format looks different.
“I know this isn’t how you pictured it, but it’s how we feel most ourselves.”
Supportive siblings: They may already be on board but still feel a little FOMO. Share the juicy details, the playlist, your vow spot, and the exact moment you’ll be popping a bottle in the desert. Give them a front-row seat, even if it’s through stories and sneak peeks.
“You’re gonna love the photos, trust me, I saved a sneak peek just for you.”
Long-distance aunties (or other curious fam): Keep it light and loving. A simple, “We’ve always wanted to do something unconventional, and this just feels like us. We’ll send all the photos!” goes a long way. Sometimes people just want to know they weren’t forgotten.
The key? Be kind, be clear, and stay rooted in your why. Their reactions are theirs to own—but your joy? That’s yours to protect.
FAQ: How to Tell Your Family You’re Eloping
Will they feel left out?
Maybe, but that doesn’t mean you did something wrong. Lead with love, let them know they matter to you, and offer ways to include them after the fact. Most people just want to feel considered.
How do we handle differing opinions?
You don’t need to get everyone’s approval. You just need to be solid in your why. Boundaries can coexist with compassion.
Should we send a video call invite?
Only if it feels good to you! Some couples love sharing a virtual toast post-ceremony. Others want the moment just to themselves. Do what honors your energy.
Your Day = Your Rules
Your love story isn’t up for debate. You deserve a wedding day that makes your heart pound and your shoulders relax. If that means a two-person adventure in the middle of the Arizona desert, then that’s the perfect kind of celebration there is.
Trust your gut. Lead with love. And know that, however you choose to tell your people, what matters most is how the two of you feel when you say, “we’re doing this, our way.”
Book Your Arizona Elopement Photographer and Videographer!
We’ll be right there with you, camera in hand, hearts full. Whether you’re dreaming up an epic Sedona elopement or chasing golden light somewhere off the grid, inquire today to book your dream team of Arizona elopement photographers and videographers.
Planning to elope in Arizona? Check out our Pinterest page for inspo and a few blog favorites for all the planning tips.
How to Include Family in Your Arizona Elopement
